What’s Holding You Back? 

​In a couple of weeks I’ll be going once again to beautiful Sedona. I’ll be creating space for people’s transformation in a retreat that I attended only a year and a half ago. The results have been profound. But I almost didn’t make it…

I was afraid. Afraid of going on. Afraid of going back. Afraid I’d keep feeling heartbroken. Imagine if we could rewind time right now, to my first retreat with Niurka for improving communication. I was getting more than I bargained for. Much more. I admit, I wanted to run away. But where to? My only options were to embrace myself or go back to the way I once was. Well, the second wasn’t really an option. 

And so I surrendered, not knowing what would happen. Surrender doesn’t mean I was defeated. Rather, I was overcoming everything that had been holding me back in the past. I was cutting the ties. I was changing for the best. 

I had a dream that night that I was looking through someone’s transcripts. I was choosing someone. But they were all me. Same name. Same picture. Different possibilities. I chose one. Then a voice spoke in protest, saying I can’t just step into one of these lives. Each one had worked their whole life on their own accomplishments. I assured her, I can. The next day I realized that I had walked into this life, knowing what difficulties there are behind and ahead, and still choosing to move forward. I told everyone at the retreat, and recognized them now as soul family. I have been with my family since. 

I went all out. I knew it was an investment in myself and chose the path for certification in neurolinguistic programming, or NLP. That meant the next step was a new beginning–Neogenesis in Sedona. There I saw myself back in time and cleared the root causes of anger, fear, and sadness. I was forever changed. And grateful! All of a sudden everything in my life started changing for the better. 

New opportunities were emerging. So I started crewing. How can I help serve even more and experience these miracles happening in others’ lives? I probably shouldn’t go into too many details of stories that happen here. But my purpose button was reset last time. 

Every bit of heartbreak I was experiencing had served me to prepare for what was going to happen. I felt real wings of energy growing months before. And I put em to good use–to hold and protect. My power grows every day. And I’m coming back to do it again! I’ve now done several retreats both as student and as crew. As student, I clear my blocks. As crew, I experience the unexplainable. And this is all real! 

I’m living proof that transformation on this level works. I live in full embodiment of my core values: devotion, unconditional love, being there for others, speaking my truth. Living in this way still brings me new lessons and even illuminates old ones in new ways as the subconscious continues to process. Seriously, one breakthrough after another! I’ve even been broadcasting them daily! 

I don’t say this to you as someone persuading you to do anything. I’m really just observing. Observing myself and my transformation (and my own breaking down sometimes). Observing our interactions. It is through observation that we allow ourselves to change for the better. I am saying this as a spirit guide in the flesh and blood to help you through whatever you’re going through and give you hope. It does get better. 

This is one step in my path to illuminate and uplift humanity’s knowledge of who we really are (hint: the universe). What’s your path? Are you willing to take the first step, knowing that I’ll be there to guide you, to catch you when you fall, to uplift and energize you, and most importantly, to love you unconditionally? 


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